To the Beat of My Own Drum
by Seito
Summary: Fake Relationship AU. In which Tsuna can't believe the hottest guy on campus agreed to the crazy plan his friends devised to get him away from his 'ex' (who was really a stalker) and Reborn who has no idea what to make of Tsuna and his crazy friends or why he makes a good fake boyfriend (aside from his father's power.) OR the AU where Reborn is the (lonely) normal one.
1. Chapter 1

It's March 9th!

I always try to post something on March 9th. lol

* * *

Tsuna's "ex" if he could be called that, was as Hayato often put it, an asshole. No, Tsuna did not want to talk about it. But if Tsuna had let them, his friends would have murdered said 'ex' without any hesitation and no one would have found the body.

A few months ago, the asshole had decided one day that Tsuna and him were in a relationship and Tsuna had been too stunned to protest and later his words fell on deaf ears. Stalker was probably a better way to describe him and there was little Tsuna could do but be dragged along. The asshole invaded his personal space and had more than once tried to steal a kiss.

Thank god for his friends who intervened left and right.

The day he belittled Tsuna just a little too much (bringing Tsuna's broken and odd family into the picture was a terrible idea), the dam broke and Tsuna's friends lashed out. Kyoya followed through his promise and bit the asshole to "death" (or at the very least a stint to the hospital). It turned out not only he an asshole, he was a stupid one. Because once he was out of the hospital, he was back in Tsuna's personal space again.

Mukuro was serious about murdering the asshole. If Kyoya's fists weren't enough of a deterrent, then more drastic measures were required. (Tsuna really didn't want his friends to end up in jail.) Going to the police was a pointless effort since, said asshole's father was police commissioner (and also an asshole.)

"Maybe if you get a fake boyfriend?" Kyoko said, one day. "I mean maybe he'll get a hint if you're in a relationship with someone else?"

"Please let's not drag an innocent person into this mess," Tsuna said. "I really don't want them framed for a crime and locked in jail because we decided I needed a fake boyfriend."

"Then get a fake, powerful boyfriend," Hana pointed out. "One the asshole can't touch because of whatever consequence his father can't get him out of it and looks super hot too."

"And where am I'm supposed to find a boyfriend like that?" Tsuna asked dryly.

"There's always Reborn," Chrome said.

Tsuna's jaw dropped. "No, no," he said. He buried his head in his hands. "No, Chrome."

Reborn was said to be the hottest guy on campus. To be fair, they were probably right about that. Tanned skin, dark hair and eyes, and very well toned from the various sports he played. Their top student with the highest scores in the history of the school. His foreign blood lending his height, the literal definition of tall, dark and handsome. Reborn was the epitome of 'cool', never looking flustered and walking around campus like he was king. Everyone wanted to either be him or be with him.

He was also the only son and heir to a wealthy heiress and powerful politician.

The perfect candidate for the girls' plan.

"No," Tsuna hissed. "I will take my chances and filing a restraining order with the police before I somehow get Reborn to pretend to be my fake boyfriend."

Fate had other plans.

-.-.-.-.-.-

Tsuna panicked as he ran down the hallway. Of course, the asshole would show up now, in a small sliver of vulnerability in Tsuna's schedule (because he was a creepy stalker) when none of Tsuna's friends and rescuers were around.

(Like literally, Kyoya was sending this jerk to the hospital every other week. One, how the hell was he recovering so fast and two, when was he going to get the picture that Tsuna didn't want to be in a relationship with him?)

He tripped and slammed into someone. Tsuna paled, recognizing that it was Reborn. The sound of footsteps made his heart pound.

"I'm sorry," Tsuna blurted out.

"It's -"

"Could you kiss me?" Tsuna cut him off. He threw a glance down the hall, half terrified, but at this point, what did he have to lose?

"What?"

Spotting the asshole, Tsuna threw himself at Reborn, locking their lips together in what Tsuna hoped looked like a passionate kiss.

"Tsuna!"

Tsuna pulled away, plastered on a cheery smile that he may have learned from his mother and without missing a single beat. "Hello Miebbari," Tsuna said.

Miebbari was pointing at him, waving rabidly as he grew a darker and darker red. "You slut!" he snarled. He moved to lunge at Tsuna when Reborn intervened, grabbing Miebbari's face with one hand and squeezing.

"What are you doing?" Reborn asked darkly, eyes narrowing.

Miebbari flailed, struggling to get free. With barely any effort, Reborn pushed him back, sending him stumbling to the ground. "Leave," Reborn ordered coldly.

Miebbari snarled again. "The fucking slut isn't worth it," he said, slinking off.

Tsuna let out a deep sigh of relief. "Thank you so much for that," he said. "I've been trying to get him off my back for months. I'm so sorry I came out of nowhere and kissed you like that."

Reborn gave him a curious look. "Why haven't you just reported him?" he asked.

Tsuna smiled wryly. "Because Miebbari's father is the local police commissioner with some considerable pull in this area. His father is equally, if not worse, in terms of personality of his son. Said father is also very close friends with the dean of the school. It was a bit of a losing battle."

Reborn nodded in understanding, most likely all too aware of the politics of adults and the games they played. "He's probably going to spread around the campus that you're a slut," Reborn pointed out.

Tsuna shrugged. "I've been called and treated worse. As long as he never comes near me again, I can live with a ruined reputation." Graduation was just a few weeks away, and Tsuna would hopefully, blissfully, never ever have to deal with Miebbari ever again. Back in Namimori, where Kyoya's family all but ruled over the town, Miebbari and his father would have no power there, no sway.

(Tsuna supposed, if it had gotten drastic enough, Kyoya's father could have gotten involved. It would have been horribly messy, there might have been blood, someone killed and Miebbari's family fleeing the country but at least Miebbari would be gone. That still might happen actually.)

Reborn stared at him, head slightly tilted to the side as he examined Tsuna. Tsuna sent a nervous smile at him, unsure what Reborn was thinking.

"Tsuna!"

"Hana," Tsuna said, turning. Excellent timing.

Hana came to a stop, head darting back and forth between Reborn and Tsuna. "Hmm, so you did ask Reborn to be your fake boyfriend."

"Hana!" Tsuna shrieked.

Reborn looked downright perplexed.

"Please ignore her," Tsuna said. "She doesn't know what she's talking about. Reborn already scared away Miebbari."

Hana snorted, crossing her arms. "You realize once isn't enough? He'll just come back. The same way he keeps bouncing back from Kyoya's attacks. Maybe we should cut off one of his legs."

"What?" Reborn asked, looking alarmed.

"She's joking," Tsuna interjected. Hana wasn't. She really was serious about cutting Miebbari's leg off. (Why were all his friends so downright bloodthirsty? He wanted them all to stay out of jail!) But there was no reason to actually alarm Reborn.

"Graduation is six weeks away," Hana said, eyes narrowing. "Could we trouble you to play Tsuna's fake boyfriend until then? You can break it off on the pretense of pursuing your own career, sell the relationship off to your father a college fling, one last wild thing before you fully settle into adulthood."

"What makes you think he'll stop after graduation?" Reborn asked.

"He won't, but we'll be returning home. Once there, Miebbari is a fool to challenge the families, all who adore Tsuna, there. No one will find his body," Hana said mildly. "The only reason why we even came to this college was because it was the closest to our hometown."

'And the most affordable one,' Tsuna thought glumly. Himself included, many of them couldn't afford a top level, ivy league college.

(Part of the reason why it had been so surprising to see someone of Reborn's status here was this was such an average, plain college. Nothing spectacular about it. It didn't stop Reborn from shining at such a mediocre school though.)

Reborn's eyebrow was arched up as he weighed Hana's words.

"You really don't have to," Tsuna said. "It's fine. I'm sure Miebbari won't bother me again."

"That's what makes you a hopeless optimistic," Hana said; her words biting and sharp.

"And you think because of my father, Miebbari won't bother you?" Reborn asked.

"That's the idea," Hana said with a nod.

"Okay."

Tsuna blinked. "Really?" He didn't really think Reborn would agree with it. Why would he? There was no real benefit for him.

"Sure."

Apparently, Fate had other plans.

-.-.-.-.-.-

Reborn was a little disappointed to be honest.

Part of the reason why he had come to such a plain college was because he wanted to get away from the brown-nosing and people who wanted to use him as a pawn in their game of politics. It turned out, it hadn't really helped and there was no shortage of guys and girls who constantly threw themselves at him, their false words rang with shallow praise.

(His mother's foreign blood apparently made him 'exotic'. Reborn stared into the mirror every day and didn't see what was it about his appearance that made him 'handsome' by anyone's standards.)

If it wasn't for his father's power, his mother's money, it was his appearance, his brain, someone always wanted something from him and it chafed him.

It was why he was disappointed that Sawada Tsunayoshi turned out to be just like them.

Originally, it had been a marked curiosity. In the four years he had been at this college, Reborn had shared a small number of classes with Sawada Tsunayoshi. This plain college was small enough that it was easy to see where they overlapped, even when their majors didn't line up. Because of that, it was impossible to miss Sawada Tsunayoshi.

How could anyone miss him? He was like a sun with a large group of friends that followed him around. They were… different. Reborn couldn't quite put his finger on it, but they didn't conform to the rules around them, marching to their own beat.

But what made Reborn the most envious was how easy friendship came to Tsunayoshi. People were easily welcomed, friendship always extended with a large and friendly smile. Reborn had, once upon a time, wished he could have worked up the courage to approach him.

(Reborn grew up alone, never able to trust any extension of friendship his way. They always seem to come back and burn him, use him and betray him. No one wanted to know Reborn for _Reborn._ )

So yes, it was disappointing to find that Tsunayoshi was as fake as everyone else Reborn had met, only interested in Reborn for his father's perceived power.

But...

But his instincts nudged him, so Reborn accepted the offer Hana had given him. Let him see how far off his mark he was about Tsunayoshi.

* * *

Hoping to make this a short 2-4 chapter fic. -ninja-

Please leave a review on your way out!


	2. Chapter 2

To Yukaraii

Yeah March 9th is a special day. 8D

* * *

Agreeing to 'fake date' Sawada Tsunayoshi opened many paths and doors that Reborn hadn't initially planned for.

Oh, the normal people reacted like how he expected. Girls and boys were crying that he was 'off the market' (which was exactly what he wanted. Reborn wanted to study in peace!) and a few guys sunk even deeper into their disillusions. (Because Reborn hadn't given any clear cues as to what gender he may or may not prefer.) The bodyguards his parents hired to keep an eye on him missed the 'fake' part of the relationship and reported back to his parents. His mother cried and his father yelled about the scandal this could cause. (Which perfect, he had no desire to make his distant parents happy.)

However, Sawada Tsunayoshi's friends all reacted differently.

To start off, a silver haired guy (Hayato, Tsuna introduced him) came out of nowhere and hugged Reborn (Reborn can't remember the last time anyone had hugged him like this), thanking Reborn profusely and that he was entrusting his 'Tsuna-sama' to Reborn. The black-haired sword carrying one (Takeshi, Tsuna said) told him that Reborn could have free sushi for the rest of his life as thanks for doing this. He wasn't the last one to thank Reborn for doing this. Apparently absolutely none of them like Miebbari.

Tsunayoshi's group of friends was large and wide. Most of them were normal, in both personality and appearance (or as normal as one got around Tsunayoshi.) But there was also a small handful terrifying people whom Tsunayoshi was friends with. No one apparently knew this, but the Demon of Campus, Hibari Kyoya was _friends_ with Tsunayoshi.

How had Tsunayoshi managed that one?!

Then there was Rokudo Mukuro and Reborn decided he was better off not knowing how those two met.

Tsunayoshi himself was the cherry on top.

Aside from holding Tsuna's hand and walking him to class, he wasn't required to do anything, not even taking Tsuna on dates. (People still bought it and every day there was someone sobbing over Reborn's unavailable status). The rumors about Tsuna were downright vicious. Miebbari's own insults fueling the fire, people viciously attacked Tsuna for daring to date Reborn. Tsuna barely batted an eyelash at the hurtful words.

(Reborn admired his confidence.)

But really, there wasn't any major changes to Reborn's schedule. He was welcomed to come and go as he pleased and wasn't required to perform romantic gestures (but for pretense, he pressed a light kiss to Tsuna's hand at least once every few days.) Instead, Tsunayoshi and his friends just… made space in theirs and Reborn's lives and just invaded. Suddenly Reborn had people who came to his sport practices to cheer him on, had people to eat lunch with, and had people who apparently gotten a hold of his phone number and would text him odd hours of the night.

(Tsuna was the most likely culprit. Why he thought 3am was a good time to ask Reborn all sort of questions, Reborn didn't know. With no reason not to, Reborn always answered him before turning over and falling back asleep.)

If this was what it was like to have friends, Reborn had been missing out.

Even if they were just using him.

-.-.-.-.-.-

Tsunayoshi dropped his head to desk with a soft 'thud', cause Reborn to look at him in alarm. "I give up," Tsunayoshi moaned. "Too many words."

They had been studying in the library, working on their separate homework assignments. Despite the fact that they were alone at the one of the table, Reborn knew that they weren't alone. He spotted Chrome out of the corner of his eye. (Honestly, why did Tsunayoshi even have trouble with Miebbari? No one left Tsunayoshi alone. Someone was always lurking somewhere.)

Reborn peered over at Tsunayoshi's homework, surprised to see Italian. He hadn't known that Tsunayoshi had chosen Italian as his language requirement. "You're translating this word wrong, this is a gerund and you forgot to take account the gender of this one."

Tsunayoshi's head snapped up, looking straight at Reborn. "You know Italian?" he blurted out.

"Well, yes," Reborn said. His mother was Italian. Of course he had grown up knowing her language.

"You're amazing," Tsunayoshi said in breathless wonder. He turned back to his homework, humming in delight as the sentence he had been struggling to translate now made sense.

It was a good thing he did that. Reborn ducked his head and lifted his book a bit higher, trying to shield his embarrassment. No one had ever looked at him like that before.

-.-.-.-.-.-

' _Did you know that May 29th is Put Your Pillow in the Fridge Day?'_

Reborn groaned as his phone buzzed with another text message. He already knew it was Tsuna texting him. A quick glance at his clock revealed the time to be 2:12am. _'Go to sleep, Tsuna,'_ he typed back.

' _But there's a pillow in the fridge and it isn't May 29th.'_

' _Take the pillow out of the fridge and go to sleep Tsuna.'_

' _But I don't know why the pillow is in the fridge.'_

' _Sleep Tsuna.'_

-.-.-.-.-.-

"Espresso, right?"

Reborn blinked at the cup that Hayato was handing to him. "How did you know?" he asked. They (being Tsuna and his friends) had dragged Reborn off to the nearest cafe to celebrate a successful practice session.

Hayato pointed over his shoulder where Tsunayoshi was approaching with another tray of coffee cups. "Tsuna-sama told me," Hayato said.

Reborn furrowed his brows in thought. How could have Tsunayoshi known that?

As if reading his mind, Tsunayoshi said, "Yesterday you were grumbling how the coffee was too weak. I figured you wanted something stronger."

Reborn blinked at him, surprised. Tsunayoshi had paid attention that?

-.-.-.-.-.-

Reborn looked at the charred and damaged field. Broken shrubbery and deep gashes in the ground. It looked like a storm had rolled through the area.

"What happened here?" Reborn asked.

Tsuna tilted his head. "Looks like Mukuro and Kyoya were sparring."

This was sparring? It looked like a warzone. "Do I want to know?" Reborn asked warily. He was learning that anything related to Mukuro and Kyoya should be avoided at all cost.

"Probably not," Tsuna said mildly, not disrupted at all by the sheer damage in the area.

"And this happens often?"

"Almost every day."

Those two had to be absolute monsters.

-.-.-.-.-.-

Another destroyed field, this time deep in the forest in what was probably not a natural clearing. "Let me guess. Kyoya and Mukuro," Reborn said.

"Actually Takeshi and Hayato," Tsuna said, picking up on the cleanly sliced branches.

"... Next you're going to tell me this level of damage is also done by the girls," Reborn said. Silence. Reborn turned around, a tiny amount of panic being to build at the lack of denial. "Tsuna?"

"Well… maybe not this level, but yeah the girls are pretty destructive too," Tsuna said, scratching his cheek.

Reborn tried to wrap his mind around that. The girls were harmless, not like Mukuro and Kyoya who were monsters in their own right, who terrorized people left and right. He could even believe it about Hayato who mixed dangerous chemicals and Takeshi whose baseball swings could break walls. But the girls too?

Wait.

"Does this mean you can do this level of damage too?" Reborn asked.

"Tsuna?"

"Tsuna!"

-.-.-.-.-.-

"Say that again."

"Hahi! When Tsuna puts his mind to it, he's the most destructive out of all of us!"

-.-.-.-.-.-

"You have a chameleon!" Tsuna cooed in delight, peering into the glass case in Reborn's dorm room.

Reborn felt his lips twitch into a smile. "That's Leon," he said with a touch of fondness. Leon had been his only constant companion throughout college so far.

"Fuuta would have loved to meet him," Tsuna said.

"Fuuta?"

Tsuna hummed, soaking in Leon's appearance. "One of my little brothers."

Ah. "I didn't know you had siblings," Reborn said. In fact, the original background check came back as Tsuna being an only child to a single mother.

"Two little brothers and a little sister," Tsuna mentioned offhandedly. "All not related, strange family circumstances and everything. My mom wasn't willing to let them go and their families didn't want them so, we raised them. Family of choice and all that." He smiled crookedly at Reborn, an unfamiliar sense of wariness reflected in his eyes as if he was ready to defend his odd makeshift family from Reborn.

Reborn thought about it, wondered what it was like to choose your own family, to stay with people who loved you regardless of whether you were connected by blood. He was all too familiar to an empty house and cold neglect. Blood meant nothing, just another fact.

"I see," he said.

-.-.-.-.-.-

"All of you live here?" Reborn asked, largely unimpressed. He hadn't expected Tsuna to show him a small two story house on the edge of town. It was run down, paint chipping, a few of its fence posts leaning sideways, inside was just as wore, the layout aged and appliances old.

"Yeah, all ten of us. Seemed cheaper than trying to do dorming," Tsuna said, scratching his cheek. "Kyoya's father wanted to get us something bigger but this was the closest to campus that could fit us all."

Reborn examined the living room, spotting the abandoned textbook with colorful tabs on the table, next to a green tea cup. A jacket that looked suspiciously like Mukuro's one tossed over a chair, a pot of flowers on the side table and a mismatched arrangement of pillows on the couch. He could see Takeshi's baseball bat leaning against the wall next to a pair of dumbbells. All in all, it looked like a well lived in house.

He looked at Tsuna who merely smiled. "It's home," Tsuna said warmly.

-.-.-.-.-.-

The buzzing of his phone woke Reborn up. Reaching in the dark, he grimaced at the sudden bright light of his screen, blinking at it. He squinted his eyes, trying to make sense of the message.

' _Where do you keep the chloroform?'_

Chloroform? Why was Tsuna texting him about chloroform at 3 in the morning? Why did he need chloroform? Reborn stared at the message, morbid curiosity starting to raise when another message arrived.

' _Reborn! Ignore that message! I sent it to you by mistake!'_

That still didn't answer his question why Tsuna needed chloroform at 3 in the morning. Far too awake by this point, Reborn hit the call button.

"I'm sorry," Tsuna blurted upon answering his call. "Did I wake you? I didn't mean to do that."

"Why do you need chloroform?" Reborn asked.

"Mukuro-"

Of course. Mukuro. That made so much sense now. "I changed my mind, I don't want to know," Reborn interrupted. "If you two get arrested, I'm only bailing you out." Plus, it would give his father an ulcer to know Reborn's 'boyfriend' was also a criminal.

Tsuna made a sound like a wounded tiger. "I'm trying to keep everyone out of jail!"

Somehow that didn't sound very reassuring.

-.-.-.-.-.-

Reborn grimaced as he recognized yet another broken-hearted girl approaching them. Would it be tears this time or maybe angry yelling? He shifted forward, trying to shield Tsunayoshi from the awkward backlash.

(Look, it might have been Tsunayoshi's idea to be in a fake pretend relationship with Reborn but that didn't mean that he had to bear the brunt of hysterical girls and boys who had illusions of dating Reborn.)

The crying girl didn't even make it a step closer before Haru came flying out of nowhere with a bright smile. She swung the girl around into the arms of a waiting Kyoko who held out a handkerchief for the girl to wipe her face with. The two of them guided the crying girl away. Chrome waved to Reborn and Tsunayoshi as she passed by, trailing after Haru and Kyoko.

Reborn just stared, jaw slacked. He looked at Tsunayoshi, pointing in the direction that girls had gone. "Does that happen often?" he asked.

Tsunayoshi lightly chuckled. "More than you think."

"Why did you need me again?" Reborn asked, curious. From everything he had seen in the last two weeks, Tsunayoshi really hadn't need Reborn (or his father's perceived influence). Tsunayoshi's friends were more than capable of protecting him.

Tsunayoshi winced. "Because Miebbari is very persistent."

Reborn was beginning to doubt that.

-.-.-.-.-.-

"Good morning!" Takeshi beamed.

Reborn scowled at him. "Why are you here?" he asked. It was Saturday and the sun hadn't even risen yet. He had no practice today, all his homework was done and he had only fallen asleep from his usual chattering with Tsuna at unspeakable hours in the morning not even forty minutes ago. "And how did you get inside?"

Takeshi just smiled even brighter. It ought to be illegal to be that cheerful this early in the morning. "I picked the lock," Takeshi answered.

… Why would Takeshi pick the lock? Why did he even know how to pick locks in the first place?

"Hurry, hurry," Takeshi said, pushing Reborn towards the bathroom. "We're going to be late."

"Late for what?" Reborn asked, irritable.

"Paintball!"

"You've got to be kidding."

-.-.-.-.-.-

"So, paintball," Reborn started, looking at Tsuna. They were huddled behind a large rock in the middle of a forest. Thankfully, Tsuna looked as tired as he did.

"Ahaha," Tsuna laughed nervously. "Hana's idea actually."

No surprise there. Kurokawa was the mastermind behind the whole 'fake dating' idea after all. Still, Reborn did not asked to be dragged to the outskirts of the city, given a paintball gun with Tsuna as his partner and told that in order to win they had to take out everyone else and grab the flags.

"Ryohei is on our two o'clock which means Kyoya is somewhere close," Tsuna said.

Reborn pop out from behind the rock and sniped Ryohei, easily picking out the white hair of the other boy among the green foliage. "I'VE BEEN HIT!" Ryohei bellowed.

Tsuna scrambled to the left, Reborn following after him. "You're really good at this," Tsuna said cheerfully.

"I refuse to accept anything less than winning," Reborn deadpanned.

"Winning for once would be nice," Tsuna agreed. He grabbed Reborn, pulling him behind a tree as Kyoya dropped from the tree tops, firing at them. Reborn returned fire; Kyoya dodging them all. Tsuna fired over Reborn's shoulder, nailing Kyoya in the stomach with orange paint.

"Herbivore," Kyoya growled.

Tsuna grinned. "Tell me where you hide your flag, Kyoya and I'll let you fight Mukuro after this."

Kyoya's eyes narrowed, excitement reflected in his storm gray eyes. "Hm, it's two miles from here near the river."

Tsuna grabbed Reborn's hand, pulling him along with him. "C'mon Reborn. There's still Mukuro and Chrome we have to take out if we want to win."

Reborn grinned and followed after him.

-.-.-.-.-.-

Reborn lifted his head, looking up the looming cliff in front of him. Its steep incline was sharp, practically vertical. He hadn't even known such a cliff was even nearby the school.

"When you said rock climbing I thought you meant the indoor kind with the fake plastic rock holds," Reborn said dryly.

Tsuna's eyes widened in horror, jaw hanging loose. "We can go back if you want," he said.

"It's fine," Reborn said, still eyeing the cliff. Above Ryohei had taken lead, bouncing up the cliff as if he was a mountain goat, uncaring about the dizzyingly high height. Mukuro and Chrome were using tridents like one would use picks, hosting them up in tandem. "Do you always do this without any harnesses?"

Reborn liked rock climbing but this felt extreme. Tsuna's expression of horror grew. "Hana!" he called up to the girl. "We didn't bring any harness for Reborn!"

"There's rope in the car if he absolutely needs one," Hana said, her words biting and mocking.

Reborn would take offense, but no, he was not so crazy as to attempt real rock climbing without any safety gear. Not on a cliff where one misstep meant falling to one's death. "And you do this once a month?" Reborn asked. His eyes narrowed as Kyoya shot what looked like a chain from his tonfa and propelled upward past Mukuro and Chrome.

"It's good training?" Tsuna said nervously. He gave Reborn a sheepish look. "You don't really have to do this. I mean, I should have brought safety gear. I forget sometimes that there's actually safety gear for this kind of thing."

Reborn raised a single eyebrow, causing Tsuna to blush a cherry red.

"Forgot," Reborn said flatly. So exactly how often did they do this that a cliff of this magnitude wasn't even a challenge to them?

He was starting to get the impression that they all, especially Tsuna, had very different definitions of 'normal', 'fun', and 'safe'.

-.-.-.-.-.-

The less said about the incident at the department store the better.

-.-.-.-.-.-

"We can grab a bite at Oyasumi," Reborn said, swinging his duffle bag over his shoulder. He had finished his run for the day. Tsuna had tagged along with him, easily falling in stride with him and they had an enjoyable run as the sun set in the distance. Daylight fading fast, Reborn looked for a place they could grab a quick bite to eat for dinner. Oyasumi's ramen was nearby and had quick and respectable service.

Next to him, Tsuna flinched.

"If you don't want to, we don't have to go," Reborn said. Perhaps Tsuna didn't like eating there.

"Ah," Tsuna said, looking away. "There's nothing wrong with that place… it's just," he let out a suspicious cough, "I'mkindabannedfromthere."

"What?" Reborn asked.

"Takeshi and Hayato may have gotten into a food fight there and we may have ended up breaking a wall," Tsuna said, flushing red.

That… Come to think of it, two years ago Oyasumi did close for a month for renovations. "Can you take your friends anywhere?" Reborn asked. The sad part was he beginning to see how easily that could have happened.

Tsuna just laughed nervously and Reborn noted that Tsuna didn't actually answer his question.

Additionally, Reborn was now banned from two restaurants, an arcade and a convenience store.

"Tsuna," Reborn said, looking at his 'fake' boyfriend. "I would appreciate it if we didn't get banned from every store in town before we graduate."

Tsuna let out a hysterical laugh. "What do you think I've been trying to do for the last four years?"

-.-.-.-.-.-

Four weeks of 'fake' dating and Reborn had settled into this schedule of trying to make Tsuna blush every day (something surprisingly easy to do), spending whatever free time he had with Tsuna and his friends (who made the best excuses ever) and was up half the night just texting Tsuna back and forth (about the strangest and oddest conversation.) The entire school was convinced by this point that yes, Reborn and Tsuna were dating, people were still loudly crying over the fact and Reborn had to endure twenty different lectures from his father at this point.

Still, he didn't know what Tsuna was gaining out of this. It didn't seem like Tsuna really needed Reborn at all and the more he thought about it, the more it felt like it wasn't in Tsuna's personality to just… use people. Against his will, Reborn had lowered his guard and in the back of his head, he knew this was going to crash and burn.

The worse part was Reborn wasn't sure he really cared. The past four weeks had been the best time in his life, full of warmth and chaos, exciting and fun. Tsuna and his friends led very interesting lives outside of college, getting into the craziest situations. Reborn found himself being swept away by it, so different and unlike anything he had done.

It was a quiet morning. Reborn walked with Tsuna to campus, hands intertwined. He tried not think too much about the warmth of their fingers interlocked, tried not to think of how his heart was pounding, tried not to think that maybe, just maybe, he wasn't even pretending anymore. It was foolish and stupid and he was just setting himself up for failure.

So wrapped up in his thoughts, Reborn barely had anytime to register that Miebbari had come out of nowhere, rushing at him with a knife until it had buried itself into his arm.

"Reborn!" Tsuna shouted, lurching forward.

Miebbari pulled out the knife, waving it at Tsuna. "Shut up! SHUT UP! I WON'T STAND FOR IT ANY LONGER YOU STUPID WHORE!"

Reborn hissed, trying to staunch the blood. Tsuna on the other hand growled, hands blurring as he grabbed Miebbari's wrist and twisted, forcing the taller man to drop the knife. He slammed his knee into Miebbari's gut, causing him to gasp, the wind knocked out of him. Tsuna pulled back his arm and then socked him across the face, sending Miebbari sprawling to the ground.

Once Miebbari was down for the count, Tsuna turned back to Reborn, tearing his shirt. He pressed the cloth against Reborn's wound. "Shit, shit," Tsuna cursed under his breath. "I didn't think… I can't believe…"

Reborn hissed in pain once more. His dark pants soaked up the blood, his normal white shirt stained red. Miebbari had gotten him good, easily three inches long and inch deep. He mentally swore up and down, angry that he hasn't reacted like he would have, too lost in his own thoughts. Tsuna frantic but justifiable response was not helping.

"Tsunayoshi."

Reborn watched as the blood drained from Tsuna's face, turning him deadly pale. He looked up to see a towering man staring down at him. His aura was menacing, stiffening and looming like a mountain. His gray eyes, cold like ice stared down at them.

"Tsuru-san," Tsuna said, voice rasped. He twisted his body, shielding Reborn, place himself between Reborn and the unknown man. "What… what are you doing here?"

Tsuru's mouth slanted downward, disapproving. "I thought you had this under control."

"I did!" Tsuna protested.

Tsuru shifted his gaze to the unconscious Miebbari, his lips twisting into a snarl. "Get into the car Tsunayoshi."

Tsuna bit his lip. "Tsuru-san."

"You've tried your way," Tsuru said harshly. "This has gone on long enough. The car has a first aid kit."

Tsuna flinched. Reborn looked between the two, wondering who exactly this man was. He tried to shift toward, hissing in pain causing Tsuna to look back at him.

Reborn looked him squarely in the eye and didn't like the myriad of emotions turbulent in Tsuna's eyes: concern, resignation, guilt. His heart clenched, mind already drawing conclusions and Reborn didn't like anything that came up. He didn't like the wounded tired look on Tsuna's face either.

"We'll take your gracious offer than, Tsuru-san," Tsuna said. His voice was firm, steel woven in the words but the shaking of his hands betrayed his fear.

"Tsuna?" Reborn asked, silently demanding an explanation. He grinded his teeth, feeling another wave of lightheadedness pass over him.

Tsuna looked away, refusing to meet Reborn's eyes. "I'll explain everything Reborn. Just please get into the car and let me treat your wound." He gently pushed Reborn toward the car. "Happy hunting Tsuru-san."

Reborn couldn't put much of a protest. He climbed into the back of the car, Tsuna sliding next to him as he pulled out a first aid kit from under the seat. Seated in a driver's seat was another man, sunglasses obscuring his eyes who started to drive once they were both seated.

"Tsuna," Reborn said again, pressing once more for questions.

"I'm sorry," Tsuna said, practically folding into himself. "I… never wanted it to happen like this. I figured your father's power was enough, that you were a big enough presence that... I… thought, I thought… well, it doesn't matter what I thought anymore." His words were bitter and sharp. His brown eyes, normally warm, were dark and focused strictly on Reborn's wound.

Reborn fought the sigh. Well, it was nothing new. People always tried to use him and it always backfired, whether it was his father putting a stop to it or Reborn's own stubborn nature ruining it for them. Tsuna was no exception.

Well, it was far past time for this charade to end.

Reborn tried not to feel bitter about it.

* * *

All things considered, Reborn handled everything pretty calmly ahaha. Or power of denial served him well when it came to Mukuro and Kyoya. xD

This fic will probably be wrapped up next chapter.

Please leave a review on your way out!


	3. Chapter 3

To Reborn's surprise, the car pulled up to Tsuna's house. He trailed after Tsuna, still holding pressure to his wound.

"So, you're the newest stray Tsuna brought home."

Reborn tensed, not recognizing the man. In a dirty white coat, shaggy brown hair and scruffy appearance, the man looked like the definition of shady.

"Shamal," Tsuna said, voice tight. "Please don't."

Shamal waved his hand, snuffing out his cigarette. "You're too soft, Tsuna. Let me see his wound."

Reborn narrowed his eyes.

"Please Reborn," Tsuna said softly. "Despite his appearance, Shamal is a doctor."

Shamal pulled out a scalpel. "He should be use to this already." In a quick slash, he cut away the rest of Reborn's sleeve to examine his wound. "This is going to require stitches. Take a seat."

There was a loud of crash. "Tsuna go take care of your troublemakers," Shamal ordered, pushing Reborn into a seat.

Tsuna merely sighed. He gave Reborn a nod and left the room.

Reborn warily looked at the shady man that Tsuna willingly left him alone with.

Shamal on the other hand, merely snorted. "Oh don't give me that look. Do you know how many strays Tsuna brings home that look at me with that exact look of distrust?"

That… didn't… Reborn actually didn't know what to make of that sentence. He didn't get a chance to ask either, when the door slammed open and Hayato came storming in.

"Reborn! That bastard got you with a knife?"

"And there is stray number one," Shamal said, wiping away the blood from Reborn's wound.

"Shut up old man!" Hayato scowled at the wound. "I knew we should have just killed the bastard." He left without another word, muttering darkly under his breath.

"Kufufu, I heard Reborn was injured," Mukuro said, entering right after Hayato had left. He was carrying a trident of all things, its points looking extremely sharp in the light. "We should repay the favor."

"Kyoya already went ahead," Hana announced, entering the room carrying a naginata. Next to her Chrome was carrying her own trident.

Mukuro's eyes narrowed. "Well, we can't let the Skylark get most of the fun."

The three of them left, their weapons still gleaming sharp in the light.

"What is going on?" Reborn asked, baffled. No one's reactions were making sense. That was completely on par with Tsuna and his friends, but it was a bit alarming to see actual weapons out and about.

"This is what happens when you get adopted by a bunch of bloodthirsty sharks," Shamal remarked dryly.

Takeshi burst in at that moment, carrying a katana. "Reborn! Are you alright? No, of course not," he said, looking at the wound Shamal was stitching.

"They already started without you," Shamal remarked.

Takeshi frowned, a strange look on the normally cheerful boy. "Well I can't let them have all the fun. Don't worry Reborn, we'll get revenge for you," he said, patting Reborn on the shoulder before he vanished through the door like the others.

"I have no idea what's going on," Reborn admitted.

"Tsuna will explain," Shamal said, tying a small bow on the bandage. "There that should hold. We'll change it tomorrow."

That was when Tsuna came back into the room, looking frustrated. "I just don't want you all to end up in jail!"

"We won't!" came the dual voices Kyoko and Ryohei through the door.

Tsuna stopped to hit his head against the wall, grumbling.

"Don't do that Tsuna. You're going to need your brain cells," Shamal said, putting away his supplies. He stood, grabbing a black bag. "I'll go make sure none of them kill themselves, so sit down with your boy toy and reassure him that everything is going to be alright."

"Shamal," Tsuna said. Then he groaned and shuffled over to take a seat next to Reborn. "Fine, you all win. I'll just make plans to break you all out of jail."

"See what happens when you let things get out of control?" Shamal scolded. He waved good bye, disappearing out the door like all the others.

Tsuna groaned again, head dropping in his hands.

"Tsuna, what is going on?" Reborn asked, finally fed up with everything. This morning had been a complete basket case. He had been stabbed, Tsuna and his friends weren't making any sense as usual, he needed stitches from a shady doctor and there was alarming number of weapons being carried around.

"Um," Tsuna said, not meeting Reborn's eye. "I guess, the first thing you should know is that Namimori, the town we're all from, is a fairly popular retirement town for yakuza, mafia, and other criminals."

"Come again?" Reborn said, not believing his ears. Surely he misheard.

"Everyone from Namimori either is, was or related to a criminal," Tsuna said with a heavy sigh. "Tsuru-san is Kyoya's father and the head of the yakuza who rule and protect Namimori. _Technically_ , the only people who have criminal records are Hayato and Mukuro for reasons I do not want to discuss. Takeshi is the son of a retired swordsman assassin, Hana's parents are some of the best criminal lawyers you can find and my own lineage can be um, be traced back to the kings of the Italian Mafia?" He ended his sentence in a soft squeak.

Reborn stared at Tsuna. Shit. He had been half joking about Tsuna being a criminal to give his father an ulcer. Paintball, the crazy stunts, lock picking, the chloroform at three in the morning, shit, it was finally making sense.

"Wait, then why did you need me for a fake relationship?" Reborn asked. If they were all criminals, surely one little stalker could be run off.

"I was trying to resolve it, in a somewhat peaceful manner," Tsuna said, groaning. "It was kind of foolish to think that. I had, wrongly assumed that you, being you and Miebbari being the son of police commissioner who has connections to your father and didn't want to 'upset' him, I thought it would be enough, at least to get through graduation. That backfired. I am so sorry."

"How is a fake relationship a peaceful solution?" Reborn asked, brow furrowing.

"Hana was serious about getting off Miebbari's leg," Tsuna said. "This isn't Namimori where thepolicelooktheotherway, and I wanted to make sure none of them actually ended up in jail, especially in a district where Miebbari's father is charge of. Kyoya already put Miebbari in the hospital once and it took a lot of string pulling to ensure he didn't end up in jail for assault."

Reborn got a sinking feeling he finally understood why everyone rushed out the room after seeing him.

"I don't really want to know what they're doing right now, do I?" Reborn asked.

"No, not unless you want to hear all the gory details," Tsuna said miserably. "Given how thorough Tsuru-san is, I won't be surprised if this area has to get a new police commissioner too."

Reborn pondered, letting the information sink in. Huh. Okay. He did get it. If a peaceful solution where no one ended up dead, involved a fake relationship he could see that. Especially if Miebbari was still coming back after being put in the hospital after Kyoya. Which, what the fuck? Reborn had seen Kyoya snap tree trunks as thick as watermelon with his bare hands. How was that not a deterrent?

It was a rather sound theory and probably would have worked if Miebbari wasn't so downright obsessed. True they were using him, but he wasn't annoyed by the reasoning. It wasn't for Tsuna's benefit, not beyond getting rid of a troublesome stalker, but wasn't for more money or to advance a career or anything else.

"So, this is the final excuse for them to just go ahead and resolve the problem as they would normally," Reborn said. Which most likely involved lots of blood and hacking off of limbs. There was a small part of him was that pleased with the idea because Miebbari had proven to be the worst kind of person. The rest of him just felt queasy at the idea.

"The fact that he attacked you makes it like ten times worse," Tsuna said wryly.

"What? Why?" Reborn asked.

Tsuna blinked at him, surprised by his question. "Because you're our friend? I mean sure we started off as this fake relationship, which again thank you so much for pretending to do that, but we do like you. _I_ like you."

"What?" Reborn repeated, utterly dumbfounded.

"You're amazing," Tsuna continued to ramble. "I mean I knew that from before, your reputation is well known, but you like espresso and have a killer paintball shot. You listen to my rambling at three in the morning when I can't sleep. You love chameleons and don't think patchwork families are broken and weird. Don't tell the others I said this, but you're actually sane and that's such a breath of fresh air. Despite that, you completely just roll with the punches and don't think we're all completely whacky crazy people. I mean you do, but you accept it and move on. How could I not love you?"

Reborn stared at him, trying to wrap his mind around what Tsuna was saying. "I want to take you on a proper date," he said, letting the words slip out.

"What?" Tsuna asked, surprised.

Reborn hit his face with his hand, sliding it down. He hadn't meant for that to slip out.

"I feel like I need to point out that my friends and family are insane and yakuza, mafia and general criminals?" Tsuna said weakly.

Reborn's lips twitched into a wryly grin. "You took me, someone who didn't have any friends, and made space in your lives to include me. You're all insane, but this is the most fun I have had in my entire life. You keep me awake all night with the weirdest conversation, and pay attention to things about me that I was sure no one even cared or noticed. You worry about what I'm feeling, about my safety and you don't actually care about my father's power or my mother's money. You're this bright sun and you see me for me. How could I not love you?"

Tsuna tackled him in a tight hug, mindful of Reborn's injury. "Yes, to the date. But not for another three days."

"Dare I ask why?" Reborn asked, amused.

"Because Hana was running a betting pool after Chrome figured out that I had a major crush on you, about 48 hours after you agreed to Hana's crazy plan. Hayato wins if we wait three days, and I can guilt him into giving us the money to pay for our first date," Tsuna babbled.

"Money isn't exactly an issue," Reborn said.

"It's the principle of things," Tsuna protested.

Reborn huffed, smiling. At least life wouldn't be dull anymore.

-.-.-.-Epilogue: Three years later-.-.-.-

"I'm home," Reborn called out. He stepped into the living room to find it… a mess. This normally wasn't an unusual thing, giving how many people were actually coming and going and actually living in the house. But, the purple goo was definitely new.

And Tsuna was sighing in the middle of it, armed with gloves and trash bags. "Oh, Reborn, welcome home," Tsuna greeted.

"Do I want to know?" Reborn asked, loosening his tie and tossing it to the side.

"Mukuro-"

"Say no more." Reborn continued to believe that plausible deniability was best maintained around Mukuro for the sake of his sanity. He rolled up his sleeves, stepping into the room to help Tsuna.

"You don't have to help," Tsuna said. "I plan on making Mukuro clean up this mess he created."

"I can help you in the meantime," Reborn said.

There was a loud crash and followed by multiple shouts and several explosions.

"I supposed now is a good time to tell you that everyone is over for dinner," Tsuna said wryly.

Reborn chuckled. "Like they are for every other night of the week?" he teasingly mocked.

A whirlwind of chaos, vibrant and bright, that was his life now and he wouldn't want it any other way.

* * *

Ah finally done! Look at these two dorks, the only sane people in a group of chaos and madness. I hope you enjoyed this plunny. Reborn the normal one was such a delight to write. I really ought to consider more variations where he's the normal one. It's fun putting Reborn of all people off balance and baffle by chaos.

Please leave a review on your way out.


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